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After declining an invitation back to her date’s apartment recently, my younger sister worried she would come off “as a tease.” So in true big sister fashion, I’m going to give you all the same unsolicited advice I gave my sister— there is no such thing as being a tease. My sister’s concern over being a tease still makes me worry that down the line, with this date or another, she’ll be in a situation where she doesn’t feel she had the right to say no, or feels uncomfortable saying it. Here are 5 things we all want our loved ones to know about consent.

Regardless of your motive, think about how flirting makes you feel. Flirting and being flirted with is fun. As we grow up, there are less and less avenues for playful interactions with other people, and eventually flirting is one of the few forms of play we have left. It’s also a huge boost to your self-confidence to be flirted with. Brain chemistry also plays a factor in why flirting can make you feel awesome.

What are sex-positive doctors or therapists? They are medical professionals who make it a point to be well-educated about sexual health and aim to provide their patients with accurate, helpful, and non-judgmental information. They consider sex to be a healthy part of life that should be enjoyed, and they’ll be able to discuss it with you without awkwardness or being judgmental about your lifestyle, sexual practices, or preferences.