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Multiple studies have shown shifts in the landscape surrounding LGBTQ topics, and recent studies show younger generations increasingly identify as something other than “straight” and many feel labels are becoming obsolete.

Only 24 states and D.C. require that public schools teach any sex education and only 20 states require that “if provided, sex and/or HIV education must be medically, factually or technically accurate.”

After declining an invitation back to her date’s apartment recently, my younger sister worried she would come off “as a tease.” So in true big sister fashion, I’m going to give you all the same unsolicited advice I gave my sister— there is no such thing as being a tease. My sister’s concern over being a tease still makes me worry that down the line, with this date or another, she’ll be in a situation where she doesn’t feel she had the right to say no, or feels uncomfortable saying it. Here are 5 things we all want our loved ones to know about consent.

You’re probably not surprised to hear that I had really high expectations for the Doxy Die Cast wand vibrator. Do you blame me? It’s gorgeous. It’s a million times prettier than my Magic Wand, it’s stronger, and it’s made from better and safer materials. Oh yeah, it also has more speeds and can be used internationally. It did not disappoint me! My Doxy Die Cast has earned a coveted spot in my nightstand (only my Magic Wand and the Njoy Pure Wand have ever reached this status folks).

Being chronically ill is also one of my biggest motivators for becoming a sex blogger (my other reasons were a love of sex and obsession with sex toys!) Even before vulva pain was an issue for me, I had so many questions from problems I would run into that not even google had good answers to—and I realized that I couldn’t possibly be the only person looking for answers. I love sex, but I’m also a person living with chronic illness, and it’s had an enormous impact on my sex life—so I’m going to keep talking about it so hopefully the next time someone goes looking for answers they’ll be able to find them.

What are sex-positive doctors or therapists? They are medical professionals who make it a point to be well-educated about sexual health and aim to provide their patients with accurate, helpful, and non-judgmental information. They consider sex to be a healthy part of life that should be enjoyed, and they’ll be able to discuss it with you without awkwardness or being judgmental about your lifestyle, sexual practices, or preferences.

When you’re living with a chronic illness there’s a lot in life you have no control over. The “Spoonies Can Have Great Sex Too” series is a discussion about how to take back control over your sex life. This edition: Dealing with sexual side effects. What are sexual side effects? It’s a term that encompasses a number of symptoms; loss of libido, vaginal dryness, being unable to orgasm, erectile dysfunction, or genital numbness. Read more to learn what to do about them.

I am the less-then-thrilled owner of a chronic illness. It’s hard to quantify just how much my life is affected by having a chronic illness, despite my best efforts to just live my life. Sex is one of the areas of my life most heavily influenced by Fred, and in turn I’m sure it plays a role in why certain toys work for me when others don’t— but I do know that it is possible to have a chronic illness and a great sex life.